


Tyl Regor's Terrible Terror [Tyl Regor x Reader Fanfiction]

by orphan_account



Category: Warframe
Genre: NSFW, Other, Warframe - Freeform, nsfl, this aint even done yet and its boutta get bad
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-07-12
Updated: 2017-09-10
Packaged: 2018-12-01 04:13:03
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 3
Words: 7,612
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11478366
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: You are the Tenno, an enigmatic warrior employed by the Lotus to keep the Origin System in balance. But when a certain Grineer scientist catches you in his eyes, things begin to have a change of pace...





	1. The Abysmal Beginning

**Author's Note:**

> Strap on your seat belts and break the popcorn out, because this is going to be the longest piece of fan-fiction I've publicly posted. I'll keep you guys updated on when new chapters are released.

It is about 8:00 PM, Tenno Time. You have already eaten your dinner, brushed your teeth, and put on your sweet Excalibur onesie. Ordis reminds you about something involving the Orbiter’s power core preparing to explode or something, but you merely wave your hand at him, telling him to deal with it himself while you’re too busy preparing to play Clem: A Man of Many Feelings. Picking up your controller, you continued where you left off last time, during a date with your dear beloved, Clem. You press a few buttons, giving your date some flowers. Clem blushes, letting out a cheerful little “Clem!” as your fictional date simmers down. You slowly blink your eyes, staring intently at the holographic screen. Knowing that you have been playing this game for many weeks now, you’ve grown slightly delusional, seeing this fictional Clem as your boyfriend of sorts. No, not a “boyfriend”, nor even a “friend” really, after what you have done with his Twin Grakatas the last time you assisted him in getting Darvo some more goods. But rather, he was like a “waifu” of sorts. It was almost ritualistic for you to hop into your transference chair, turn on the game console, and visit your dearest Clem. After many, many weeks of grinding both in-game and outside of the game through micro-transactions, you were prepared to truly finish the game, with the best ending, which had already cost you 1.5 million credits thus far in multiple past attempts. Inside of your inventory was the in-game money to pay for your date, various dating tips you received from Darvo and the like in-game, and… the golden Grakata, something no man, woman, or otherwise would ever say no to.

However, as you settled down comfortably to enjoy your rather delightful and immersive date with Clem, you receive a rather loud and obnoxious message, from a Tenno by the name of “Xx_SwagMaster69_xX”. The message simply said “[Equinox]”, hyperlinked to display the Market entry containing the data for the Equinox Warframe, and you receive another message: “Come on, dude! I gotta have her! She’s LITERALLY my wife and I need her! Please, please, pretty please?!”

God… fucking damn it, you scream internally.

“Fine, Jerry,” you groan, pausing the game to create a save state and suspend the game for the time being. Your not-so-best friend, Jerry, has been nagging for you to help him farm Tyl Regor for Equinox parts. Why he doesn’t just do it himself is beyond you, as this guy’s not just not a noobie, but he’s a Founder, constantly emblazoned in his Excalibur Prime in every mission. Besides, you have far more better things to do; your Kubrow needs tending to, and that creepy infested room is getting creepier by the moment. Gotta do something about that. Plus, isn’t Jerry’s loaded in platinum after you gave him a $50 gift card to shut him up? Why doesn’t he just buy his own? Well, storytelling, my friend. Sit tight, it’ll be a while.

Donning your Warframe and equipping your weaponry, you and Jerry send yourselves off to Uranus. It’s dark, it’s wet, it’s hotter than the Void, and worst of all, it smells like shit, so much so that you could smell it through Transference. Like Jerry always has, he’s in his ever so edgy black-and-red Excalibur Prime, ugly enough to make you tear out your eyeballs. Keep in mind, my dearest reader, you have to deal with him for a whole eight times… at least. You take a moment to check the Warframe Wikia in hopes that the grind wouldn’t be so bad… until you see a big fat “52” for the number of average runs. You groan some more from within your Warframe, tired of dealing with this annoying neanderthal of a guy. Oh, what you could give to be in those big, muscular, caring arms of Clem’s right about now, dozing off into a night of good sleep...

Taking out your primary weapon, the two of you descend into the depths of the Grineer sea-labs. Grineer troops of various shapes and sizes scream Grineer drivel at your faces, but you make a rather quick work out of them using your arsenal. While it appears that they die fast, it’s more like you are the one killing everything while Jerry is too busy scanning things to not give a damn. “Jerry, come on,” you tell him, reminding him that the two of you have a mission to complete and you want in and out of this hell as soon as you possibly can. But Jerry cannot hear you, for Jerry still does not give a shit. You scream in agony from your Transference Room. He scans a common Grineer storage crate.

Following the corridors to the next room, you see that it has caved in, with water flooding from above. You bullet jump across the hole, easily making your way to the other side. Jerry, unknowing about the new movement system, fumbles around, jumping from platform to platform and constantly falling in. “Jerry, you’re supposed to bullet jump,” you remind him. He does not know what a bullet jump is, and is too insistent upon knowing what he is doing for you to help him. You continue on through the corridor, reaching another lab room. The echos of your “friend” still failing in their endeavor of reaching the other side could be heard from where you are at. You take your secondary weapon out and finish off the rest of the Grineer in the room. Jerry has yet to return from his troubles. You sigh in relief, sitting yourself down on the brutish floor panel so that you could take a break from your Warframe to rub your face in frustration another time, your hands taking a rather harsh grip upon your head. Next to your Warframe is a chunk of Gallium. With your melee weapon, you smash it open, and receive a single bar of Gallium. While you take this small moment of solace, Jerry soon quickly returns. “Hey, dude! Check out what learned!” he yells to you, showing you… how to bullet jump. “Really cool, huh?”

You nod in agreement, although in your mind you can’t help but scream yet again.

The next room that you are lead to is a small dead end. Water surrounds both you and Jerry, which may allow you to use your Archwing. Despite praying to every single deity you could possibly think of, Jerry decides to take a dive into the water. He gets stuck underneath the Grineer platform and cries for help. You cannot do anything, not just because you don’t have the power to, but simply because you couldn’t possibly care about him at this point. Getting the mission done and extracting was your biggest goal. You could’ve finally been free from Jerry’s reign of terror upon you… had it not been for the in-UI chat. “Dude! DUDE, COME ON!” Jerry screams at you. You take a deep breath, and send to him “./unstuck”, with a period in the front so that it wouldn’t execute the ‘unstuck’ command for you. It is no use, however, for Jerry just spams “./unstuck” with the period anyway, leaving him trapped, submerged underneath the water.

Eventually, while you are making your way through the next lab corridor, Jerry is charging right behind you, scanner in hand and scanning practically anything and everything that can be scanned. “Why don't you get yourself a Helios?” you ask him. He tells you that he needs Carrier’s Vacuum. You remind him of the Vacuum Within, and that all sentinels can use Vacuum now. Jerry, however, doesn't believe you, as he is under the notion that DE still doesn't listen to their player base. You grumble under your breath something about how you wish to strangle Jerry’s lifeless body until he could no longer be discerned as an actual human being. Jerry scans a Drekar Butcher that is attacking him.

As you and your Founder friend descend further into the depths of the Grineer sea-labs, it becomes even more of a challenge for you to deal with him. He continues to whine about the game’s current state, and about how you keep getting more kills than he is, while he is waving around his unmodded Skana Prime. His complaints embedded themselves into your mind, giving you quite the migraine.

You approach upon a room that preludes the one for the boss fight. It is a large, sprawling area filled to the brim with Grineer bio-pods, filled with living embryos of potential future marines that you or your brethren will no doubt slaughter easily like the cannon fodder they are. There were few scientists and Grineer guards inside of the lab, which you had swiftly ripped the lives out of their very bodies in little time, forcing the lab into a nigh silence, had it not been for the creaking of the waterworks surrounding you. The water-filled pipes that line the walls appear as if they’d burst at any moment, from both lack of maintenance and lack of control over the sheer pressure of the water. You look behind yourself, seeing Jerry running towards you in a rather brisk pace. Great, you groan internally. “Hey, dude!” he yells out to you, waving his hand in the air frantically. What the hell could he be on about this time, you wonder to yourself. You sigh, and ask the guy, “What is it now, Jerry?”

“Dude, we gotta abort the mission,” he exclaims to you.

“Jerry, what the fuck!” You scream in a fit of rage. “Can’t we just get this done and over with? It’s a quick five minutes!”

“But my FASHIONFRAME, dude!” he cries. “I didn’t use the right colors for my Excal’, man! How am I gonna show Tyl Regor how sexy my Warframe is if it’s not perfect?!”

“Jerry, you’re just going to change the red to black and black to red,” you slowly but rather painfully firmly rub your face with your hand. You knew already that this was about to be a very long night of farming, but this was nearing your breaking point. While you were fond of the art of FashionFrame, and practiced it yourself, Jerry was… less proficient at it.

“So what? I want Tyl to be 200% impressed by my luscious looks!” Jerry argued, sticking his leg up in the air in a complete 180 degrees. If there was one positive thing about Jerry, you’d suppose it’d be his Warframe’s flexibility. “Let me be beautiful, dammit!”

“Jerry, no,” you put your feet down in refusal. There was no way that you were going to waste any more time than you already have. But, despite your refusal, a message pop-up on your HUD shows that Xx_SwagMaster69_xX has left the squad… leaving you all alone, hidden beneath the depths of Uranus. You can’t help the desire to sigh and shake your head; Tyl Regor wasn’t exactly too hard of a boss, or at least, you don’t recall him being one. In fact… it’s been a while. Your own Equinox has been in your arsenal since she was released, and ever since, you haven’t really fought Tyl Regor. Regardless, although you could abort the mission to go and get Jerry, or you could simply wait, the temptation to just abandon Jerry and get it done and over with was far higher than that of actually just waiting for him for about two to three minutes for him to change his Warframe colors...


	2. Tyl's Turn

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Now, with Jerry gone, you meet Tyl Regor face to face. Things start to get awfully wet...

“The VIP is in your proximity, Tenno. Take them out,” The Lotus, also known as Captain fucking Obvious, points out before blipping out of the radio. You sigh and shake your head; you never paid much attention to the Lotus anymore, as you've heard her a billion times at this point, you were sure of it.

Maneuvering your way through the tubes and corridors of the final room, you reach the boss fight room. A menacingly large statue of Tyl Regor looms from above you, staring down upon you. From afar, you hear the sounds of tapping, furious tapping, of metal between metal. The man himself, the glorious Tyl Regor himself, was approaching. The mask that covered his scarred Grineer face stares directly at you, his eyes glowing a distinct and vibrant orange. His masterfully molded pecs glistened from the drops of water that had fallen from above the lab, and his arms, thick and muscular, adorned two giant, Grineer fists, which you could easily had fit in the palm of just one mere hand. From the reflection off of his massive statue, his Drekar blunts are indeed as massive as you had last recalled them. An instrument of life, he was to the Grineer, conjuring biological creatures used for his studies, which had one sole goal: to extend the lives of the Grineer and turn back the effects of cloning deterioration. Although you were not on his side, you knew of his loyalty to the Grineer. He was sworn to the Twin Queens, through and through, and his pride seeped through every bit of his being.

“Tenno!” his beautiful bass voice sang. “I have been eagerly waiting for this moment, when I can finally crush you!”

You couldn't handle yourself for even a moment. He was simply too good, to majestic for this world, and you knew that. A one-of-a-kind he was, and a one-of-a-kind you simply had to get your hands on. You drop your weapons and run towards him, arms spread wide open as you awaited his embrace. The thought of Jerry plaguing your life has melted into nothing, and there was only left a man who could potentially trump Clem as your one true waifu. But alas, your Warframe’s face is immediately hit by his shield as the Grineer scientist defended himself against your sudden adoration to the Grineer scientist, forcing you down to the ground. “What in the name of the Queens is wrong with you?!” Tyl Regor roared in anger. “Have you been driven mad, Tenno?”

You slowly shake your head in disagreement, ogling this hunk of a Grineer man. He was massive and toned, almost like a statue himself. Combined with his voice, he was simply a dreamboat. If the Grineer could reproduce… why, regardless of whatever you may be, you'd gladly carry and raise all of his children if he ever so desired. He was smart, handsome, and especially curious about who the Tenno were.  He was simply too good for you to pass up, and this was an opportunity you could not waste.

“Oh, I see,” Tyl Regor snickered. Had it not been for his mask, you could only assume that he was smiling. “You wish to be… one of my test subjects, little lizard?”

“Y-Yes,” you stutter. Tyl Regor’s very being dominates over you. You could feel your heart furiously pounding in your chest, both in fear… and arousal. Oh, how you simply dream of him holding you tenderly as his Vulkar pushed deeper and deeper into your Void, vigorously thrusting into it and preparing to fill you with his Clem. Or, even attempting to see how far he could push your limit with his Knux… Redness covers your face, bullets of sweat trailing down your forehead and over your cheek. You are more than prepared to give your body over to him to do as he pleased, to try all sorts of ‘experiments’ upon you until he is satisfied, and from the looks of him, he appeared as if his ‘experiments’ could go on for quite a long time. Thoughts of him tying you down to a surgical table and doing rather questionable actions with your flooded your mind, making you giggle to yourself a little. Even the thought of him standing there, a mere few feet away from him, felt almost like a dream. How you wish you could just reach up to him and grab onto his...

“I-I didn’t mean it that way, you imbecilic lizard!” the Grineer scientist exclaimed in embarrassment, aware of your lewd and indecent mental imagery for one reason or another. “I thought you were donating yourself to the advancement of the Grineer, not attempting to send yourself off into some grotesque, euphoric daydream!”

You stare at Tyl Regor blankly. He… rejected you? The man that everyone had insisted was such a saucy, sexy Grineer with unusual kinks had kinkshamed you? You felt as if the world was suddenly collapsing upon you, and that everything you had known about WARFRAME was all a lie. What was next, you thought to yourself, could Cyclone Kraken actually drop from the Kuva Fortress? Could Darvo have an actually good deal for once that doesn't get bought out the instant that it comes out? Could [DE]Steve wear his glorious pink shorts again? Regardless, you begin to sniffle up from the emotional distress the situation caused for you. Tears began to roll down your cheek. Your dreams of being held in that Grineer’s buff, loving arms began to fade away. Perhaps you even consider whether or not if abandoning your digital husbando for Tyl Regor in the flesh and blood was really worth it. Maybe this was all for nothing? But perhaps a different approach could be made, you thought to yourself. Something less… creepy.

“You know what? Yeah, I do want to fight you, Tyl Regor! Right here, right now!” you bellow in return. “I'll kick your ass to the sun and back! I'll kick your Tubemen’s asses! I'll kick my own ass!”

“Now _that_ is a more suitable tone for a formidable foe!” Tyl Regor laughs, unsheathing his Ack and Brunt from himself. You do the same, equipping your primary weapon. Now was go time… but you couldn't help but feel a bit remorseful. He was an easy fight, for sure, but you imagined all the times you could've spent with him, feeling his metallic Knux trail about your body as Tyl plunged his thick Gorgon right into your…

 **_THWACK!_ ** your Warframe went flying across the room in recoil. While you were busy fantasizing to yourself, Tyl Regor charged right towards you. Your Warframe slams onto the glass ceiling, cracking it generously enough for a few spurts of water to flow through. The hit was enough to imbed your Warframe into the window, but not enough to make it stay in; it falls back down onto the floor, leaving you staggered for a moment, unable to control your Warframe. Tyl Regor was by no means looking for a hot, passionate night with you, from how he was literally slamming you… across the battle stage. While you busied yourself by fawning over him, he bashed and he crashed himself into your Warframe, not enough to really kill your Warframe, but enough for him to be very intrusive. By now, there was no way to convince him otherwise. Once you've regained control of your Warframe, you take your primary weapon and fire at him, damaging him enough to get him to move onto the next stage.

“Just when I thought I’d lose hope on a good fight,” Tyl chuckled, aiming his Knux at the two glass ceilings of the lab and firing at them. Water roared as it flooded the lab, causing you to bullet jump onto the top platforms lest you enter… sharkwing mode. You shiver in fright at the thought of plunging into the water while you were fighting Tyl. Certainly, it'd make you not only very moist and vulnerable for him to ravage your insides, it'd also be an incredible pain in the ass to get out of the water anyway.

As you reach the upper levels, Grineer Manics and Bombards, well, bombard you as if they were greasy weeaboos wanted your grimy hands off their one true waifu. Swapping to your secondary, you make the task of killing the Bombards a rather easy feat, but the Manics were another story. They kept disappearing and reappearing, making them increasingly difficult to aim your secondary weapon at. In desperation, you simply swap from your secondary to your melee weapon of choice and dice, pierce, or squash the Manics into tiny little bits. With their defeat, Tyl Regor returns to the battle once more. “So, you were able to defeat some of my finest Tubemen?” Tyl sat himself on one of the large water pipes rather sensually. Like before, he aimed one of his Knux towards the ceiling and fired, forcing the flood level of the field to rise exponentially. As the room filled with water, however, you begin to notice sparks coming from the water. “Well, I don't suppose we should turn up the stakes here, do we, Tenno?”

With your melee weapon still in hand, you rush towards Tyl Regor, swinging it towards him. Tyl blocks your attack with his Brunt and manages to try and swing back at you, but instead misses. Taking advantage of the chance you had, you swing your melee weapon at his head, causing it to critically damage him. He staggers onto the floor and, in the rush of the moment, fires his Knux directly towards you. Your Warframe flies across the room once more, falling into the waterfall of seawater and falling into the water below.

Initializing your Archwing, you look around desperately for a way out as the electrified waters zapped away at your health and shield systems. Drekar equipped with underwater weaponry approach towards you, ready to attack. You swiftly scan the arena, and upon seeing a spot where you could dismantle your Archwing you rush towards the water’s surface, shooting out of the water like a Daikyu’s arrow going through enemies, modified with a +3.0 punchthrough.

Tyl Regor was now on his last legs. His once pristine body was now limping, covered in the blood of his fallen tubemen. “The Lotus… she doesn't love you. Not like I loved the Tubemen you murdered,” Tyl monologues, aiming his Knux at you once more. However, you dodge his detachable knuckles and quickly slam him one last time with your melee weapon. The Grineer scientist falls to the floor, allowing you to easily finish him off. He moans and groans in pain until the lights in his helmet dim down to a complete off state.

“Great work taking down the VIP, Tenno,” the Lotus thanks you from your radio before disappearing. You couldn't really care much for the Lotus; you've always joked about her being the “space mom,” but ultimately you'd take any replacement over her dull, droning voice. Darvo. Clem. That one forgettable bitch you saw that one time that you now bum for Ayatans. The Syndicate leaders. _Anyone_ but the Lotus would be nice, you ranted to yourself. A replacement for that claptrap Ordis would also be a nice touch, you added in your inner monologue. Perhaps a more fashion-based Cephalon that could help you with your fashionframe game? After all, you did spend practically 1,000 hours of your playtime merely dressing up your Warframes like the game was some elaborate 3D dress up. Thinking about it now, Jerry could use a little something like that… one day.  
As you depart his lab, you take a glance at his body one last time, sitting on the floor lifeless. You couldn’t help but feel a little awful for the deeds you’ve done, but perhaps it was for the better. After all, it was what you came for: to get parts for Jerry and leave… until you remember that Jerry had long left the squad. In his absence, he has spammed you with at least 30 messages, ten being complaints as to your delayed response, and twenty being bad, outdated memes. You sigh before speeding through hall to hall until you reach extraction. Your landing craft arrives, and you holster your Warframe onto it as the ship departs from the Grineer lab and back to your Orbiter.


	3. A Loser's Lament

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After having been turned down by Tyl Regor, you return to your ship. Your heart is heavy, and your mind is full of doubt... and unparalleled desire.

Arriving at your Orbiter, however, you couldn’t possibly feel more guilty than you did then and there. What you had done back at Tyl Regor’s labs was… embarrassing, to say the least. You unequip your Warframe and weaponry and, upon disconnecting the Transference link, you slump down on your chair to think to yourself. The thoughts of Tyl Regor flood your mind, thoughts of his rejection and refusal… but also _him._ His muscular exoskeleton, his voice, his Knux, and especially: his sweet, sweet… laboratory. You couldn't resist the urge to fantasize about him, of him doing all kinds of things to you. You knew that any attempt at making these dreams into reality were next to impossible, but the mere idea of him was simply unbelievable to you. You are infatuated with him, lustful over Tyl Regor… and you _hated_ it.

Turning towards the clock nearby your transference chamber, you noticed how late it has became: 2 AM. Next to it was the calendar; tomorrow was when Baro Ki’Teer would arrive at the Larunda Relay. You rub on your tired eyes and sigh, setting your heartbroken feelings aside. Now was not the time to sulk; rest assured, Jerry would be back at it again in the morning… wait, _Jerry_. You realize that you had completely forgotten about Jerry, who exploded your chat window with at least 200 messages before going offline himself. Smiling in relief, you pulled your body out from the transference chair and took a nice, long stretch before walking back to your room and throwing yourself into bed. You tucked yourself in, snuggling up next to your Clem bodypillow. It was expensive, and well made, too- when squeezed enough, it’ll say “Clem!”. However… tonight, you didn’t squeeze Clem. Tyl Regor was far too on your mind for you to even think about being with anyone other than him. The man you had once loved ever so much, enough for you to consider him as the one… becoming a mere memory compared to Tyl Regor. Your eyes slowly come to a close as you drifted off to sleep, without a single thing waking you u-

 

*CRASH*

 

You pop right up from your bed from the sound of something shattering. Following the hallway out from your bedroom, you look to find Ordis taking control of one of your Warframes, your Limbo in particular, sitting on the floor with a broken Clem noggle in hand. He was frantically trying to piece it back together, as its head simply popped off from the body, by using a Nukor to melt the plastic. Upon noticing that you were staring at him, Ordis jumped up from the floor with a shriek.

“O-Operator! _*What the hell are you-*_ I-It’s not what it looks like!” Ordis cried, shaking his head and hands wildly.

You groan, turning back around and heading back to bed like it was nothing. You were simply too tired to deal with more bullshit thrown at you, and whatever was going on would need to be dealt with tomorrow. From your fatigue, you almost instantaneously fall back to sleep.

* * *

 

Your dream is vivid. You were in it, your body cold and frail. Being held in Tyl Regor’s arms, the two of you are watching the sunset together, lounging outside of Tyl Regor’s labs. The sky is a rose-like color, with a beautiful amber stone that was the sun suspended in the sky. As clouds fade, stars began to peer through, just enough to allude to the evening. The air was warm and sweet smelling, just enough to be enticing but not too much, lest it be sickening to the stomach. From behind you, a Grineer servant scurries over towards you with a bottle of some pre-Orokin champagne in one hand and two liqueur glasses in another. He pours the drink into each glass, preparing it for you and Tyl Regor to enjoy.

Tyl Regor sighs, letting go of you with one arm to reach for a drink. “For you, my love?” he offers to you. Should you take the glass, he’ll replace his free hand with his own glass. “To the years we spent together, and the years we will spend,” Tyl Regor toasted, tapping his glass onto yours before taking a sip. You follow suit, taking a drink from your own champagne. It was strange tasting, having a distinct sweetness to it. You wondered for a moment why all of this sweetness hasn't made you sick to your stomach yet, but simply set it aside to enjoy the sunset with your lover.

Snuggling up next to him, you find yourself too short to kiss his face, so instead you kiss his sweet, sweet mantitty instead. “You are safe, my love,” Tyl Regor hums, bumping his head on the top of yours as if he were kissing you. “I’ll never let anyone hurt you.”

It is surreal. You could feel him, his warm body pressing against yours, his every heart beat in rhythm with yours. “I love you, Tyl,” you tell him.

“I love you too,” says Tyl in return, patting your head. The two of you are in equilibrium, your once cold body now warm to the brim from Tyl’s own. For once in your turbulent life, you’ve found peace, even if it was merely in a dream, to be forgotten once you awaken. It was a rather joyful yet foreign sensation, to be happy and at rest.

You doze off in his arms, feeling his torso. It's so muscular, so _thick_ , and so… odd? Opening your eyes back up, you look down upon him to investigate, only to uncover a shocking discovery.

He’s pregnant. With _your_ baby.

What the fuck.

“Oh, isn't it beautiful?” Tyl sighed, his voice beginning to change. It was raspier, more hoarse and direct. “Just a few more weeks until your Daddy’s going to be a daddy!”

What the _fuck_ . You wonder to yourself whether or not you’ve accidentally taken any drugs before falling asleep. Wake up, you tell yourself, but you simply couldn't. You look back up at Tyl’s face, only to find not his mask, but _Vay Hek’s_ instead.

**“WE’RE GOING TO BE PARENTS SOON, TENNO!”** his voice boomed. **“FEEL MY BELLY, OUR BABY IS COMING!”**

You began to cry. You wanted out of this nightmare, out of this _hell_ , but alas, dear reader, you are trapped… and this was only the beginning.

**“DON'T CRY, HONEY, YOU’LL WAKE UP THE OTHER KIDS!”** Vay Hek exclaims, noting the rather questionable amount of cribs lined along the side. His yelling helped little in this predicament, as several of the babies inside of the cribs began to whine, more and more adding onto this choir of pain. The sounds of their cries rang through your head, causing quite the hefty headache.

To your luck, however… the crying soon stops. All is now silent, as if time itself had stopped. Slipping from Vay Hek’s manly grasp, you studied the surroundings around you.

You reluctantly touch Vay Hek’s Tyl Regor Tummy ™, feeling the kicks of this supposed newborn child you were going to have with him. **“ISN'T IT BEAUTIFUL?!?”** Vay Hek wails once more. **“AND TO THINK, I WANTED TO KILL MY FIANCÉ.”**

His… fiancé? Oh, _no_. Oh, no, no, no. You wanted nothing to do with this. Struggling, you cry out for help, but alas, it was as if nobody could hear you.

**“I'M SO GLAD THAT I MET SUCH A SWEETHEART LIKE YOU, TENNO,”** Vay Hek coos, giving you a big fat smooch on the mouth. His blue lipstick stains your lips, leaving a permanent mark on your face. He then proceeds to give you a barrage of kisses, continuing until your entire face was as blue as a crewman taking a shotgun shell to the face was red. You wanted to cry, to shed tears, but your body stayed absolutely still, as if you lost all control of it.

“ **I SHOULD PAY YOU BACK SOMEHOW, HMM?** ” Vay Hek offers, licking his Coral Blue Number 5 Semigloss ™ lips as his Tyl Regor hands trailed around your body. You tried to shake your head furiously in refusal, but alas, it was in vain. He begins to undress you, gliding his cold, metal fingers across your warm skin. Before he could do any more to you, you are able to close your eyes, for just one moment...

* * *

 

You wake up in a heavy sweat, screaming. Your dream… had quickly twisted into a nightmare. Seeing Tyl like that, why, you were on the verge of puking. At the same time, however… it was also heaven. Being held in Tyl’s arms, giving you his reassurement, something about that moment you simply couldn't not look back upon. But every time you imagined it, you couldn't help but see Vay Hek bursting into your dream like a terrible forced sidekick in a bad fanfiction.

Immediately, inspiration strikes you.

Rushing to your transference room, you began to write. “A Scientist’s Sole Lover,” you wrote a title in. “A Tyl Regor x Reader Fanfiction”. Your fingers swipe across your keyboard as you typed your story furiously. Adding a little this, a little that, you found yourself working hard on the little piece of writing you wanted to create. About two hours later, give or take, you found yourself with the perfect piece of fiction to have ever been created in the post-Old War world:

* * *

_A Scientist’s Sole Lover: A Tyl Regor x Reader Fanfiction_

_By GrineerFucker69_

 

_AUTHOR’S NOTE: IF UR A GUY THIS MIGHT HAVE HOT YAOI ACTION!!! DON’T LIKE DON’T READ!!!_

 

_Tyl Rego was sitting in his lab. His body was really hot and sweaty from doing all kinds of science-y things. By science-y things I mean sitting around in his lab looking hot and sexy while his scientists are doing actual work. He was really hot. His chest was large and wet from all the lotion he puts on in the morning. You would think that this guy is invincible. Well you! are!! wrong!!!!_

_He turns arund!! and sees you!! His eyes turn into heart shapes. “T-Tenno!” he cries out to you, his arms wide open. “I’m so relieved to see you again!!”_

_You turn into jely looking at him. He was really really hot. Like really hot. His butt looked really good from where he was sitting. Like, all big n muscular n round n sexy n shit, it was great. Made you forget that’s where he poops from._

_“R-Regor senpai,” you stutter. Your heart is beating rapidly, your knees weak, mom’s spaghetti. “I-I wanted to ask you something…”_

_Tyl Regor turned his hot, muscular body over towards you, stretching his leggies real far. They were indeed so hot, you could fry an egg. “Yes, Tenno?”_

_“R-Regor senpai, will you… will you go to prom with me?”_

_“T-TENNO, YOU REALLY WANT TO GO OUT WITH ME?!?!?” Tyl Regor screams in delight as he gives you a big squeeze. “This is the best day of my life!!!”_

_(Timeskip cause SCREW YOU IM THE RIGHTER!!!)_

_It’s Friday night, prom night. You’re standing around in Tyl Regor’s basketball court, where the prom is being held because Tyl Regor can. Dressed in your best clothing, you ran through the crowds of Grineer, trying to find Tyl…_

_Tyl, now at the juice table, was sitting all sexy like before. He was also looking for you. No matter how hard he tried, he simply couldn’t find you. He grew desparate, standing up on the top of the table to stick his leggies up even further. You would think he’d fry two eggs instead of one. With the power of his leg-sight, he was able to quickly find you again. “Tenno!! I thought I lost you!”_

_“I thought I lost you too Tyl,” you sigh in relief. Jumping off the table, Tyl Regor rushes over to you to give you a big hug. But now… they were gonna annoucne the Prom King and Queen/Other King!!!_

_“And the Prom King is… Tyl Regor!!! For 50 years in a row!!!” the Grineer announceed. “And the Prom Queen/Other King is… the Tenno!”_

_The other grineer were like, “yaaaaaaaaas bitch yaaaaaaaaas” and it was really great. They gave you and Tyl these cool crowns and sashes and flowers and stuff and it was really great. The newlky proclaimed Prom King was holding you, yes YOU!! In his arms. “I love you so much, Tenno…” he cooe to you. You give him a kiss in the face and you two make out while Tyl Regor runs into the sunset._

 

_THE END… or is it? TO BE CONTINUED!!!_

* * *

 

Wiping the sweat off of your brow, you made a hearty sigh and a smile upon finishing your masterpiece… and noticing that you overslept. 2 PM, the clock on your transference chamber said. Your not-so-friend Jerry is back at it again with spewing messages at you, this time around was some drivel about some new Prime items that were just recently released, and how he needed to farm them.

“Come _on, already!_ ” his messages whined at you. “I gotta have him, dude! He’s my husband! Please?!”

Fine, fine, you grumble to yourself. “After lunch,” you respond to his bawling before sitting up from your transference chair. After going for so long without eating, you _were_ pretty hungry. It was starting to get rather annoying, having to deal with bodily requirements after centuries of being locked up tight on the moon. “Ordis, I’m hungry, can I get something to eat?”

“Not until you clean up your room, Operator!” Ordis snappily refuses. “I’m tired of watching the orbiter compartment turn into a derelict from yo- * _your disgusting filth-_ * messes. You’re not getting a single calorie until I see that room spotless!”

Really, Ordis, you thought to yourself. You are the operator, the _Tenno_ ! You serve the Lotus, the _greater good_ ! Ordis should be on his cephalon knees begging to be by your side, not nagging at you like a disgruntled mother. You cross your arms in protest. “Well, I guess I’m starving to death. What will you do without your _operator_ , huh?”

“Operator, by the stars!” exclaims Ordis. “Are you really trying to fight with me, over _this_ ? * _I suppose you’ll die, then-_ * fine. Have it your way, but I’ll be choosing what you’ll be eating.”

Damn it, you comment silently to yourself. You wanted Kronia Fried Chromas.

“You will be having… _Tenno rations_ ,” your cephalon chose aloud. “The protein meal!”

Sudden flashbacks. You’re taken back to the Orokin era, after you and your fellow Tenno have been taken out of the Zariman Ten-Zero. The gilded halls, the golden walls… and the odor that was the rations served to you. A stench so foul, that could surpass that of the Infested, surpass that of Sargas Ruk’s breath, surpass even the nasty old people smell that reeks off of the members of the Corpus Board of Directors. They served it to you every single day, three times a day, until you were deployed for Lua. You must’ve spent at least four or five years enduring that gruel, and to even fathom having it again was like a nightmare come anew.

“Your rations are availible from your foundry, Tenno,” Ordis annoys you in his typically cheery tone, as if nothing had happened. You sigh. Just one won’t hurt, you tell yourself. You’ve dealt with it for several years, you can deal with it for one meal… right?

Upon taking one bite out of your rations, your first go-to destination is the compost removal compartment of the orbiter. The taste of the rations sickened your stomach upon contact with it. It reminds you of memories you had once left locked away, memories of the Old War. The Orokin, the Sentients, Margulis, Ballas, Jerry when he wasn’t such a fucking cock, the old Warframes, and…

“ **TENNO!** ” a familiar voice bellowed to you.

Oh no.

“ **TENNO, HAVE YOU FORGOTTEN ABOUT OUR WEDDING?** ” Vay Hek wails in disbelief as his massive Terraframe tore through your orbiter compartments. “ **HAVE YOU FORGOTTEN ABOUT OUR** **_CHILDREN_ ** **?** ”

_Oh no._

You rush for your arsenal, attempting to take out a Warframe to fight Vay Hek with, but you were too late. Vay Hek furiously grasped you with his weird Grineer robot hands. “ **HOW COULD YOU DO THIS TO ME, TENNO?! YOU LEFT ME!** ”

Struggle as you might, you simply couldn’t escape. “ **YOU’RE NEVER GONNA LEAVE ME NOW! AHAHA!!** ” The Chancellor hoots and hollers as your orbiter collapses into...

...an outdoor wedding? The skies, a bright blue, were cloudless, the sun suspended high above your head. There wasn't a tree in sight, strangely enough, but it still felt as if you were on Earth. The little wedding setup was somewhat elegant looking, if anything a bit cheap-looking but otherwise quite lovely. A variety of Grineer were also found at the wedding, dressed in their best, although a Grineer’s best was, more or less, just what they usually wear. Even Ordis could be found, still using your Limbo for some reason or another. Although Vay Hek is still holding onto you tightly, you find yourself in a rather nice looking wedding dress. Vay Hek, too, is prepared for the occasion, dressed in the exact same dress you were in, complete with a little tiara and a veil. “ **OH, TENNO, AREN'T WE A BEAUTIFUL COUPLE?** ” Vay Hek scream-asked. “ **NOW YOU CAN NEVER LEAVE ME, NEVER, EVER,** **_EVER_ ** **!”**

Fuck. You try to wiggle your way out of his hold, but upon seeing you attempt to escape, he holds onto you even tighter, his mechanical digits digging into your skin to the point of nearly drawing blood. “ **TENNO… I COULD NEVER BE HAPPIER THAN BEING HERE WITH YOU** ,” Vay Hek continues to scream. It appears a volume button was never installed onto Vay Hek’s terraframe. “ **EVEN IF… I DON’T LIKE THE TENNO. I LIKE YOU.** ”

While Vay Hek was monologuing, you were pulling at his fingers to try and pry him off of you. His hands simply dig deeper into your torso, practically stabbing you on three sides. “ **TENNO… I MUST ASK YOU ONE LAST THING BEFORE WE MARRY** ,” Vay Hek adds. “ **I WANT YOU… TO THROW ME INTO THE SUN**.”

What.

“ **YOU MUST, TENNO. I-I LIKE IT THAT WAY,** ” Vay Hek stutters. “ **PLEASE, TENNO, THROW ME INTO THE SUN! LET ME BURN TO A CRISP LIKE THE FILTHY SCUM I AM!** ”

“I _would_ , if you could let me go!” you finally are able to exclaim. Vay Hek sat you down on the ground, freeing you from his grasp. Large, gaping holes were left from where he was holding onto you, allowing ample blood to spill on all sides. You double over in pain, wincing and crying, but Vay Hek pays no heed to your suffering.

“ **OH, FINALLY! PLEASE, TENNO, MY LOVE, DO IT! OH, BY THE TWIN QUEENS, I AM READY FOR YOU, TENNO**!” Vay Hek announces, falling towards you.

As the massive terraframe leaned over, you close your eyes, bracing for impact as you hope to wake up from this nightmare....

* * *

 

You awaken in a pool of your own sweat once more. Ensuring that it wasn’t a dream, you opt to pinch yourself rather forcefully, leaving two red marks on your arm that left a rather painful sensation. The clock near your bed read 11 AM. A dream within a dream… definitely not the weirdest thing you’ve come across, but it was certainly among one of them. Slipping out from your bed, you find yourself surprised by the lack of messages you’ve received. You’d think, by now Jerry would’ve clogged your inbox to the brim with messages whining about how he wants to farm Equinox. It was an odd feeling, being the one to message Jerry first before him, but you had to do it. It was for your _man_.

“Hey, Jerry…” you tell Jerry, hoping to get his attention.

“What do you want, I’m busy fashionframing,” Jerry groans, trying to pick which eye burning red he should use on his Excalibur Prime.

Now was your chance. To return to your one and only, your true love, even for just a mere moment. You knew that, despite Jerry’s rather long list of shortcomings, he would give you another chance at meeting your beloved Tyl Regor again. You take a deep breath, preparing yourself to ask Jerry…

“Could we… go back to doing that Equinox farming again?”

Jerry’s eyes widen, but not long after did they dim. “Oh! A-bout… that,” his voice was uneasy. “She’s too much work. I just bought her instead.”

You sat in your transference chair silently. For the first time in your life, you hated Jerry not for being an idiot, but for not being an idiot. “Oh,” you simply tell him.

“I do need relics for Hydroid Prime, though,” Jerry quickly adds. “I need to go farming for some. I gotta get him, he’s OP as shit right now! I can’t be the lame loser who doesn’t have him! He’s my fuckin’ husbando, dude!”

Fuck. Fuck. God fucking damn it. Fucking Christ. Fuck. **_Fuck_**. Not here. Not now. And especially, not with Jerry. In your rage, you block him, preventing him from messaging you again. Pent up in anger, you let off a furious scream. You wanted to be with your man, and you wanted to be with him _now_ , and you weren’t going to let this fool stop you from being with him.

“Okay, fine, I’ll find someone else,” Jerry grumbles in disgust. “Sheesh, you don’t have to be such a dick, you know. If you’re some kind of Warframe expert, why don’t you just solo him?”


End file.
